Tuesday 15 July 2014

My Fantasy Suitcase

Hey there,

In the spirit of the enthralling activity that is packing I present a blog post on the subject...and no this won't be a list of all the boring things you pack for any holiday (black vest x3, pure cashmere socks x 8, yeti fur coat x 1 etc etc). No, this is a list of the things my poor, beleaguered common sense is saying "don't pack, you really don't need it" while my playground-bully of a heart is screaming "pack it! this [insert item] is the one thing that will make the difference between an amazing life and a sobbing mess during the year!!!!".

So readers, I give you, the list of things I probably shouldn't pack but, if there's room, they will make it in the suitcase somehow.


1. British Breakfast Tea. Lots of it.
Gotta get my fix. (And no, I don't represent PG tips, honest.)

This came up in one of my original posts 2 years ago. I love the German beverages (particularly apfelschorle and, natürlich, the beer) but I'm sorry, my blood is actually 50% tea infused and I just can't bring myself to wean myself off it quite yet. So I WILL be lining my suitcase with as many tea bags as possible, and hopefully won't get questioned about it at customs.
Chance of being packed: 10/10

2. My duck radio.





A present from my housemate Helen for my 22nd birthday, which I adore (even if it is a bit creepy looking into his eyes). I know Germany has radios. Hell, I'm pretty sure they have engineered much better [sic. less bulky] radios that can be bought for a euro or two but I'm a big fan of background noise when at home alone (aka I'm a wimp) and I can't help getting attached to something that soothes me AND reflects my inner child..

Chance of being packed: 3/10

3. My Trier mug.


When you're a tea fanatic like I am, the vessel which transports this treasured nectar takes on an unprecedented importance. When one of these sacred vessels happens to be a) pretty and b) a nice reminder of your favourite German city, the attachment soars to maternal levels. Whilst the rational side of my brain is pathetically pleading that hot drinks taste the same regardless of receptacle, my hands are busily rolling up a pair of socks or two to stuff into it and vaguely justify its presence in the suitcase.

Chance of being packed: 7/10

4. My onesie!




This caused me much deliberation two years ago (read here) but I took it with me eventually. The 2-years-older Beth realises several things: its the middle of summer; I foresee no fancy dress opportunities for a while; I need to grow up. That said, Hamburg is allegedly bloody cold in the winter, and it is invaluable during the chilly nights, so while I will probably leave it at home this week, I may bring it back at the end of October, when I'm back in the UK for my brother's wedding.

Chance of being packed: 1/10

5. Photos/postcards/bunting.

Practical value: 0 (save for collecting dust), Sentimental value: 10.

I've strung lots of these pictures etc together, and sewn others onto a string. Quite aside from reminding me of my lovely friends, they also have a magical power of transforming bare, unfamiliar rooms into somewhere where you feel vaguely more at home.

Chance of being packed: 10/10 (or as many as reasonably possible)

6. A British Pillow

A couple of years ago I had a mini-rant about German pillows and their ridiculousness. Who needs a pillow that, the moment you lay your poor, aching head on it, immediately acts like the red sea and parts in the middle, leaving just two thin layers of pillow cover between you and the mattress, and rendering it essentially useless? To add insult to injury the pesky stuffing fluffs up around your ears, meaning you are simultaneously pillow-less yet suffocated and overheated by its contents.

Picture of what will be my bed, sporting a fine specimen of a crap pillow.

Tylor wrote a similar post complaining about the Atrocious German Pillow . It's a widely-acknowledged expat issue, apparently.*

Anyway, this is one thing that I really think Britain does better, and I will try my best to bring a sensible, rectangular pillow with me. However, due to size constraints, this will sadly not be a priority.

Chance of being packed: 4/10

7. Bovril/Marmite




Toastbrötchen and bovril or marmite is, in my view, the perfect unison of British and German cuisine.

OK, I joke (rather, I don't want to be lynched) but I do love a bit of marmite on toast in the morning and whilst you can buy it in Germany, it is notoriously difficult to track down and costs an arm and a leg. Bovril I have never spotted in 'Schland. So a pot of each will be packed, and it WILL be made to last until the next time I can get an emergency package/return to UK shores.

Chance of being packed: 8/10.

8. My bike helmet.

Ok I know this is definitely something I can get in Germany, but they're kinda expensive and why buy a new one when you've got a perfectly decent one at home? I will be cycling every day to work and back (about 30 mins total) through the city, so protecting the grey matter is pretty important. That said, they are an awkward size and shape, so I may be forced to begrudgingly give in and purchase a new one. Or wear it on the plane, and be THAT person.

Chance of being packed: 5/10

9. Cwtchy ikea chair.



Cwtchy but no...just no.

Chance of being packed: 0/10 (sob)

10. My signed Welsh flag.



Signed by all my home and uni friends on my 19th birthday, this has extra sentimentality. But is it a bit too much? Opinions on a postcard please.

Chance of being packed: 6/10.

11. My cat, Merlin.


Quite apart from the practicalities/illegalities of sending him to mainland Europe in a suitcase, he's a fussy bugger and would probably turn his adorable nose up at German salami.

Chance of being packed: 0/10 : ( : ( : (



If I were to include all of these items in my suitcase I would firstly fill it and secondly have no room for practical things, so I will be selective as possible. I miss the childhood days where your mum would pack all your clothes in her own suitcase as you'd already filled your own with vital things like a one-legged barbie, crumpled books and sparkly feather boas, and this was acceptable.

I'll update this with what actually made it to Hamburg when I've made the final cut.


In other news I've discovered there's an expat community meet-up in Hamburg a couple of days after I arrive. Whilst this wouldn't be my ideal avenue for meeting people, I figure you've got to start somewhere. At the very least it will provide some entertaining anecdotes for this blog, if nothing else.

In other, other news graduation tomorrow!



*Probably not, I'm probably just fussy.

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